Fear of getting a life!?

I could never have imagined the changes that would come about so suddenly and unexpectedly. These past few months have been hard. But I do have peace in knowing that I am exactly where I need to be for the moment. It’s a good thing, cause I’m stuck!

Believe me, I’m no saint. I called my biological siblings at least once and said, “Get yourself down here, cause I’m out of here!” But with the prayers of my siblings in the Lord, I always pull through those moments of crisis with a better attitude.

Since becoming a full-time caregiver for my mother, I’ve been forced to slow down in areas of my life that are very important to me. And though I am often frustrated at the loss of my time and autonomy, much good has come of it.

Last year I wrote about getting to know my little brother better. This year it’s been adjusting to living with him. It takes two here, as Mom cannot be left alone—ever. We work well together as a caregiving team, but there are other factors involved (will share later on those) that must be dealt with, and being the strong-willed people we are, we’ve butted heads more than once.

Don’t worry, we’re fine 😄.

Here’s my dilemma. I currently live over 600 miles away from home. Don’t know when I’ll see “home” again, and things are settling down enough with Mom that I have started thinking about my total lack of social life here. Now, I’m not much for social life just for the sake of having one; I’m a notorious loner and homebody. But that doesn’t mean I never enjoy doing things with other people. I do.

So, last week I joined a CrossFit gym. Not for a social life but because I’m so bored with my regular workouts that I’d stopped going altogether. And I truly love CrossFit. It’s hard work and challenging, and I absolutely love it. I can’t remember the last time I worked out five days in a row—literally can’t remember. But I did it last week! I’ll give myself a hand 👏👏👏.

But that was only the beginning. I found a writer’s group at the local library, which just happens to be located across the street from the Senior Association, which just happened to be having an event when I showed up for writers’ group. So, I popped in to see what they had going on. Well, my goodness, they have line dancing classes every Friday. No, I can’t line dance but always wanted to learn. And, … the gal that leads the classes plays guitar (I play guitar!). We were thrilled to meet one another and agreed we’re going to jam.

Yes. I know I put the above image in already. But it’s so relevant today. What do I do if I actually end up building a life here? When the time comes, do I go home … or stay here? Do you see my dilemma?

Thanks for subscribing to my updates. Still writing. Making progress on my novel and on track to publish a second edition of, Woman this is War!, which will be republished as, God and Women: Deconstructing the Christian Caste System. Posted this past week on The Hungry Hearts Bible Commentary and on God and Women. Check out the links to all my columns on the homepage of Jocelyn’s Landing!

Jocelyn Andersen is an author and book editor who writes and speaks about a variety of topics. Her work has been featured in magazines, newspapers, radio, and television. She is the author of several non-fiction books and is currently working on her first novel.

On a more personal note: Most of my columns (I have several) are focused on the issues and passions I write about, but in the past, I have rarely written about what’s going on with me personally. This is the place for me to get over that. Connect with me on Facebook, Goodreads, LinkedIn, and X. Links to all my Substack columns are here.

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